An Appeal From Tiny Women: “Please Stop Hoisting Us Into The Air ‘Dirty Dancing’ Style”

But can we? Can we if we really tried? Some of us shouldn’t even attempt it. I understand the urge, but not everyone is capable of Patrick Swayze’s upper body excellence.
I am, which makes abstaining from the act of heaving frightened women into the air all the more daunting.

“enough is enough, It’s not charming or remotely appropriate” Said one tiny women. Moments before she was flung, adorably, into the air.

This raises bigger questions: Can the courtesy of bodily autonomy be extended to bodies smaller than oneself? If so, how can this be done? And who are you, my mother? 

The movement is picking up steam. What was at first a cartoonishly high-pitched plea for reason is quickly becoming a full-blown coalition of itsy-bitsy-grumpies demanding change. The future of tossing small women skyward is unclear. Experts on the issue say that it may be best to get all your dirty-dancing-small-gal-tossin’ in now, as the act may soon be illegal.